"It was a business decision."
That was what my now former manager told me when I was let go from my job today. Part of me feels messed up inside. How am I going to pay my bills and get out of debt now? I'm going to be homeless, I don't think I have any great skills that could land me a job quickly, and I feel like a completely incompetent idiot who couldn't make something so "simple" as my current job work.
But actually, on the other hand, part of me is glad. I enjoyed what I did, but hated how my job went about things. And honestly, when I found out that the owner of the company and the main office manager were in-laws, I should've taken off then and there. No offense for the mom and pop places who actually treat their people well, but I've had bad experiences (and heard other stories) about how those types of places usually treat people. Businesses only exist to make the top dogs money; if you're not in the inner circle, might as well toss yourself out the door.
They claimed that I was making so many mistakes that were "costing the company money." Okay, fair. In this instance, I was tossed back and forth between roles in the span of a few months that it was a slim-to-none chance for any actual training. My people-pleasing side tends to freeze up and constantly second-guess myself if I don't 100% understand something and am confident at it. Even still working on this again, it's my Achilles Heel that can make me look incompetent. I know I can succeed if I had the right kind of training and a patient boss. But I don't think those exist anymore.
But I don't want to give up. Maybe this is one door closing and another door opening. If I can gain skills less than a year into my job, I'm sure I could do it all over again elsewhere.
If anyone has any advice about bouncing back from something like this, feel free to drop it in my email. As for tonight, I'm going to try and take it easy until Monday. We're hitting the ground running on this one.
Thank you to anyone who reads this, and I hope life treats you kinder than it has for me lately.
-Mimi